Tonight after baby went to bed, I wandered into the kitchen to grab a glass of water, and something in the corner by the trash can caught my eye.
It was a cardboard box I had set aside to take out for recycling, with three Tupperware containers stacked jauntily inside. I knew how they got there: Lately, while I busy myself preparing meals, Little Lars has taken to entertaining himself by taking all the things out of the kitchen cupboards and giving them new homes. Clearly this was his handiwork.
Seeing it made me smile. Our house is strewn with many evidences that we shelter a tiny human here: stroller, high chair, board books, crib, diaper bag, piles of toys, the works. It was invigorating to happen upon an evidence created by him–not something we bought or accumulated for him. It is the beginning of many marks he will leave on the world, the kind you and I and all immortal-legacy-loving humans yearn to make: I was here. It is evidence of his “increasing personhood,”* a prospect that is both thrilling and overwhelming. He is gradually growing from one who is acted upon toward one who acts. One who has his own opinions, plans, and dreams, and then works in earnest to make them real. As his mother, I feel the weight of my responsibility to teach him how to act.
I loved seeing this little evidence that he is increasing in his own personhood, and I feel so grateful to be able to witness and support him in this journey.
* Phrase lifted from The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society, which has been amusing me in audiobook form this week.
spifftacular. 
Holly, I love your ‘increasing personhood’ reference. That is so on the mark for Lars. I have seen his personality emerge bigtime in the last few months and it will only continue to amaze you how he will develop from an infant into toddler, child, teen, and eventually morph into adulthood. That kid is personality plus! I want to tell you how much I adore how great and insightful you are as a Mom. Lars is truly blessed to have you and Dave as his parents. You are so involved and focused. I have witnessed the devastation that happens when adults ‘check out’ from being a parent to satisfy their own personal agenda and interests and you and Dave are on the opposite end of that spectrum. I am so proud of you!